Now you already know that. You might not be the perfect boyfriend or girlfriend but you are becoming aware of where you fall short and make a genuine attempt to improve. You fall in love more slowly this time, more deliberately. You want to make it count. You discover the joy of staying in.
With your first love you were eager to go out and show off your new love. You realize why some bad things happen. Without your first love crashing and burning you could never realize how thankful you are for this love that actually works. These words are for us all. Beyond Worthy , by Jacqueline Whitney. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday.
Like Wise says, "Our hearts are resilient and you are meant to love again. It can be a product of age, environment, stage of life, or never having [experienced] this indescribable feeling before. It may be intoxicating, captivating; it takes your breath away and sweeps you off of your feet," says Wise. You are not so innocent, as you have been in love before and felt all the emotions that go along with it.
You are a bit more protective, want to make sure the relationship could work long-term, and you don't want to repeat past mistakes. While falling in love for a second time might feel different, that doesn't mean that you are any less in love than you were the first time around. In fact, Wise says, "If you are taking your time and moving slower, it may feel more secure and more real as you are trying to evaluate if this person has long-term potential. This is different than your pure first love, where you may have fallen hard, very quickly and then asked questions later.
It's rainbows and butterflies and everything rom-coms have taught us. While falling in love for the second time is still wonderful, it can feel much scarier because you know what's really at risk and you have an understanding of the pain that comes with a relationship ending," says Kat Haselkorn, matchmaker at Three Day Rule. Falling in love with someone new can feel more real, because in some ways, there is more at stake than with your first love.
You know what the hurt can feel like and yet you're still willing to suffer those consequences on behalf of loving another person," says Haselkorn. In my professional and personal opinion, the trade-off of feeling a little less 'high' is totally worth the self-knowledge that comes with some relationship experience.
Romantic comedies and celebrity love stories emphasize things like love at first sight, intense and immediate chemistry, and falling head-over-heels in love. She explains that it's common to be a bit confused when it comes to what you think you're supposed to feel when you meet a good match. Do I feel respected? Do we have shared values? Are we looking for a similar type of relationship at this time? These questions are much more likely to lead you to a happy relationship than the 'high' feeling of falling in love," she says.
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